Updated with a link to a trailer to my movie at the bottom. <We call this a “teaser’ in the biz.>

I’ve never made a movie. I’ve never been in a movie. I have a cousin that was in a movie once and I have seen several movies. I have some really kickass ideas for making a great movie – romance, car chases, explosions, special effects, aliens – the works. And I think we could make this movie for a couple hundred bucks by promising the actors and all the others who work on the movie larger royalty cuts. Also, we could hire homeless guys to play all the roles and just Photoshop the heads of big named actors over their unkempt mugs in post-production. Dub in the dialogue in post-production, too, like those Hitler videos on YouTube. For the car chases and crashes, we use a bunch of those cars that were rendered useless for Cash For Clunkers and just pull them with tractors – maybe “stop-action” animation – I dunno, special effects or something. Anyway, as you can see, I have the ultimate blockbuster movie all figured out.

Darrel Oscar Award

So go ahead and nominate me for an Academy Award. Go ahead, I have the POTENTIAL to make a great movie. In case you haven’t heard, the paradigm has shifted, folks, and accomplishments mean nothing compared to “the promise” of success. It would also help if everybody reading this has “hope” that I can make a good movie. I might have to go around and make some speeches talking about the “need” for more great movies and how I’m “for” making great movies. If so, I’ll make that sacrifice of my time to do so. Because, after all, really great movies aren’t made unless someone talks about making them ad nauseum.

I believe that if I were to be awarded an Academy Award, I would consider it as a “call to action” to make a great movie. I promise to make a good movie if I win – what more do you want?

Trailer: Show me da movie!

Cross posted to Direction For America

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